How to make your child listen to you

 “My Kids just don’t listen.” A common complaint of Parents?

In our last post on How to Stay Calm, we shared what you could do when your kid triggers you.  In this one, lets explore how to get your kids to listen to you.…

1. Stop Talking

You’ve heard this before, but it’s worth repeating—we talk too much. One expert clocked the number of corrections (“hang up your coat,” “clear your plate”) a child is given daily, at 200. How many of those do they actually retain? Only about 25 percent. Now, 25 percent doesn’t sound like a good batting average, but in fact, what it means is that they’re absorbing about 50 directives a day. So talk less but make it count.

2. Allow Natural Consequences to unfold

It’s time for less talk and more action. We would recommend some idle threats. If your kids won’t put their toys back no matter how many times you tell them, pack them into a box and pretend them to put it in the dump or garage for a while.

3. Model Active Listening

Children learn most from observing and, let’s face it, many of us aren’t good listeners either. Oh, sure, we hear something of what others are saying, but we’ve got one ear cocked for an incoming text, our eyes on the road and, quite possibly, our head in the clouds. Active listening is about hearing the (sometimes hidden) meaning behind the words and responding to it. How often can you say you do that?

4. Love, love, love
Sometimes, kids don’t listen in order to send us a message, They tune us out to make a point: “You can’t make me, and I’m tired of you bossing me around.” It’s time to restore goodwill. You’ve got to put some deposits in the love bank. So, even though you feel like strangling them, hug them instead.
And, if you’ve tried all of that and they still won’t listen…
5. Whisper

As our frustration levels rise, so do our voices. Kids end up feeling yelled at—perpetually. Lowering your voice to a whisper is exactly the opposite of what they’re expecting, and that may result in a surprising new outcome for you. Besides (and this trick works with everyone, spouses and bosses included), when you speak in soft tones, people are forced to lean in. And don’t we want our kids closer?

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